I had a discussion on s3x with a medical doctor this week. The reason was that I was searching for solutions to the s3xual frustrations of married couples. One of the frustrations is the inability to have at least two rounds of s3x at a go. This frustration is in alignment with a myth about how needful and good it is, at least, two rounds of s3x for married couples. According to the myth, more than one round of sex is a pointer to great s3x.
My medical doctor also confirmed the existence of this myth about marital s3x.
So, I kept thinking and researching about it, and my findings and conclusions are the heart of this write-up.
Having more than one round of s3x in a marriage is important. This is not true. While a married couple can have two to three rounds of s3x at a go, it is absolutely not important. Great s3x has nothing to do with how many rounds one does at a go. You can have a round of s3x at a go in your marriage, and still enjoy great s3x.
I do not think my husband and I have done more than one round of s3x at a go, for more than five times in our almost 30 years of marriage. We could have s3x twice a day regularly, but I can count the number of times we had two rounds of s3x at a go. Yet, we are enjoying great s3x in our marriage.
As a result of this myth, many couples are labouring themselves on the search for ways to have rounds of s3x at a go in their marriage. They have come to tie s3xual fulfilment or performance to how many rounds of s3x at a go they can engage in. Thus, they crave how to last for two hours during s3x with their spouses.
I frequently get asked by some followers of this column how to have more than one round of s3x at a time. This is coming from the myth earlier mentioned. No wonder the market for ‘manpower’ has witnessed consistent growth in our generation. No thanks to this myth or make-believe.
There is absolutely no reason why one should lose their peace over the inability to have more than one round of s3x at a time in marriage. It is absolutely not important. What is important is to enjoy great s3x, which definitely is not tied to many rounds of s3x at a go.
What great s3x entails
Great s3x is beautiful and comes from the art of sex. A wife once said, in a conflict resolution session with her husband, that her husband did not know “how to s3x.” In essence, there is a “how” for s3x, and not knowing it will endanger a marriage.
As I write, that wife and husband are divorced today, and the main culprit is not knowing how to have sex in marriage.
How to have s3x includes the following
*Foreplay
*S3x styles
*S3x timing — morning, afternoon, evening or night.
*Quick s3x
*S3x locations outside the bedroom and bed. Places like the sofa, floor, bathroom, kitchen, etc.
*Get away moment of s3x.
All the above are ways to enjoy great s3x, without having more than one round of s3x at a time. You can have full details of this by reading my book ‘Enjoying Great S3x’.
The myth of many rounds might have come from prostitution or side-chick experience. S3x with a prostitute or a side chick is not something regular or permanent. So, the tendency is to make use of the opportunity while it lasts. It is like trying to have the full value for one’s money for securing the engagement. So, many people involved don’t spare efforts to go as many rounds as possible, courtesy of sex enhancing drugs, in most cases.
Trying to subject one’s spouse to such an experience of many rounds of s3x in marriage is not important. You have yourselves always and for life, so you can take your time to enjoy yourselves to the fullest.
The dangers of the myth of many rounds of s3x in marriage.
*Unrealistic expectations from your spouse. You will come to believe that unless you can engage in many rounds of s3x at a go, you are a bedroom failure. And the same way is how you perceive your spouse and vice versa.
*Emotional and physical exhaustion in couples. You feel emotionally drained trying to engage in many rounds of s3x at a go, and this greatly impacts the physical well-being of a couple.
* Unnecessary quarrels over nothing. This happens when the couple cannot agree on many rounds of s3x at a time. This is one of the reasons a spouse may be dodging s3x, through many excuses. It could be the undertone for many unexplainable conflicts among couples.
So, let married couples stop losing sleep over a myth that has no strong basis for great s3x in marriage.
You can avail yourself of copies of my books, Enjoying Great S3x in Marriage’, and ‘How to Help Your Wife Enjoy S3x’. Contact 08112658560 for details. SMS only.
READ ALSO: The mindset for s3x in marriage
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